


Baby Steps

by AwatereJones



Series: Bunny Rabbid [2]
Category: Torchwood
Genre: Alt Verse, Drag Queen Ianto, Drama, F/M, Family, Gen, M/M, Romance, cross dressing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-25
Updated: 2018-09-03
Packaged: 2019-04-08 00:24:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 14,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14092974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwatereJones/pseuds/AwatereJones
Summary: Bunny/Ianto and Jack are now settled in a routine with their new nine month old terror who rules like Stewie in Family Guy. Ianto still has insecurities, as he always will but Bunny is as confident as ever. Gwen and John are still out there somewhere scheming and now an old friend pops up in Jack's life to stir things with a large Gwen provided stick.Alt Verse with crossdressing





	1. Chapter 1

The buggy was more like a car with a handle and it was doing Ianto's head in no end.

Bright red, monster wheels and an overly excited child clutching at the little wheel looked as crazed and manic as his Daddy they were going to meet up with. Ianto glanced down in time to see the little tot once again wrench the wheel as if trying to ram the car into a passing pedestrian and he was again pleased it was only a pretend wheel and Quinn could not really control the vehicle or there would have been several hit and runs already.

As they passed the subject of his ire the little one leaned out to look back, craning his head, then sitting back with a huff of air as he clutched the wheel for another go.

"Pop really knew how to get to his little man's heart" Ianto muttered as the child's face lit up, a woman now wandering across the walk ahead with a little dog on a leash. Quinn gave a small snarl as they passed and to Ianto's horror actually reached out to snag the leash, then slapped his hands on the car's side to see if they had got the dog.

Bugger.

You could see it on his face, clear as day that he was disappointed that another victim had survived the afternoon massacre he had dreamed of.

"What has you all pissed at the world my love" Ianto sighed, finally reaching the café and turning the vehicle to manoeuvre it up through the doorway. Then as he was jiggling it there was help and it was lofted at the front and slid through. Ianto looked up to thank his husband only to find a man he had never seen in his life was now crouched to coo to the little toddler and admire the carriage.

"Well now, this looks lovely. I bet this didn't come from around here" he said as he reached out to touch Quinn but he shied away as Ianto yanked the carriage back.

"Quinn doesn't like mollycoddling" Ianto warned, "He had particular ways. Quite the little man."

The man rose to look at Ianto and he knew it was the accent. Although he had lived in America for …. Hell …. Eighteen months? No. That long? Well … Quinn was about nine months old now so… wow. Ianto wasn't sure if he was surprised as it had been that long or because is felt like he had always been here.

"Lovely eyes, Quinn?" the man smiled, "Hi there little Quinn, I'm…."

"Rod" Jack said and Ianto looked up, smiling as his husband stepped into view from the other room of the café, "Thought I heard your voice. Hey there cowboy."

Quinn was reaching up demandingly and Jack leaned in to unclip and lift him to his hip, the toddler now looking satisfied with the actions of his other favourite slave….ah…parental.

"No!" Rod gasped, "He's yours?"

"Gray. He married Ianto's' sister, then died. As did she when this one was born. So, Ianto and I were faced with raising him" Jack said and Ianto felt a weird feeling of … well … where was the mention of love? Their own marriage? Jack made it sound like some sot of arrangement and the long tiring day with a grizzle monster seemed all that more heavy for a moment, then Jack smiled at his friend.

"Of course, I got the best end of the stick, didn't I. Turns out a gorgeous Welsh beauty took my heart even more than Rhiannon's took Gray's. It was like … an instant spark of something and I was head over heels. Who would have thought, huh? Me. Like a moth to a flame, my gorgeous love seems to like me too, forgives almost everything I do and I am sure you know that covers a plethora of things. Yah. Big word son, Plethora. Means myriad, or collection or lots and lots. Yeah."

"Quinn is interested in words, he doesn't speak but seems to drink in everything. He likes hearing long words. Plethora." Ianto said as he addressed his son and little eyes widened as he listened, Jack shivering.

"Gods baby, that's naughty to tease me in the entire café" Jack hissed under his breath, "I will remember that word for later."

Ianto laughed and accepted his son as Jack seized the handle of the carriage and shot it around to its usual resting place, instantly inciting madness as the staff saw it and all rushed to steal their little cherub.

Ianto watched the baby disappear and sighed softly, "And like a fart in a high wind … he was gone."

Rod looked at Ianto with undisguised interest as Jack walked to the table his Great Coat was already waiting at and as Ianto went to sit he felt his chair get moved out slightly, then pushed to his knees as he sat.

Ianto wondered if Jack had noticed.

It had been Rod showing him some attention.

He wasn't sure how to react.

Especially as Jack had shown no reaction at all.


	2. Not a good night

Rod was in town promoting a hypnotist everyone was raving about. Some smartarse Ianto hated on sight, his huge smile as he talked with Jack making Ianto's teeth jingle.

"Look at this" Rod said suddenly, leaning into the conversation with a flyer "Bunny Rabbid. Singing tonight here at the bar, wonder what she's like."

Jack went to reply and Ianto placed a hand on his thigh to let him know he was uncomfortable letting them know it was him so Jack leaned back and let them make plans to go see her. He was sure they would be surprised and hoped this would put them on the back foot as Adam seemed too interested.

That evening Bunny swept into the bar and the place went silent as everyone watched with glee, her swishing skirts making her more flouncy than usual and her songs were all ones of sexuality while Jack leered happily.

Bunny was between sets taking a quick drink when Adam appeared, "hello pretty lady."

Bunny blinked and stepped back, "Hello."

"Wow, you are spectacular. What is the story with you and the Captain there. I thought he was with the man with a stick up his arse" Adam leered, "You are something else."

"I am his wife" Bunny explained as she tried not to bristle, "Ianto is Quinn's uncle."

"Ah!" Adam smiled, "So … wow. I am impressed. A shitty little town like this and such a hidden gem."

Bunny felt alarm as Jack came up behind him, his face changing as he heard the comments and Bunny spoke quickly before there was bloodshed, "Yes. This bar is wonderful, we see many shows here. I believe yours is tomorrow night?"

Adam started as Jack stepped around him and laughed weakly, "Yes, the acoustics are great, you must come. Complimentary tickets for both of you, ah … one for the suited man?"

"Sounds great, yeah?" Jack said excitedly before she could motion that she didn't want to go. "Me and Ianto?"

"Oh, Ianto can't come" Bunny said firmly, "He will be minding Quinn. I will be there with bells on … well, maybe ribbons anyway."

Adam laughed and poked Rod who looked at her with renewed interest then gave Adam a look that she didn't understand but didn't like much.

.

.

.

.

They entered and found seats reserved near the main stage, Bunny demure in the Hepburn outfit that had some commenting on how petite her waist was and those long legs looked lovely in the pants.

Adam came down from the stage and reached out to place his hands around her waist and Jack made a noise as he stepped between them "Sorry partner, I don't like her touched. She's mine and bruises easily."

Adam smiled softly as he stepped back, his look changing as he held his hands up, "Understood. Now, let's get the show underway."

As the show progressed he asked several times for volunteers, finally encouraging Jack up and now the place was in an uproar as Jack clucked and pranced about, even Bunny placing her hands on her ribs as she laughed at him, Gods he will be embarrassed. She noted some were taping and knew she had to get a copy.

As the evening drew to a close Adam leaned in close to talk to Jack, then stepped back and released everyone back to their seats. Jack came back and flopped down, "See? Knew he couldn't get me."

"Bunny? How about you love?" Adam asked and everyone clapped, her frown as she looked at Jack imminence as she was surprised that he didn't defend her.

"I don't like losing control you all know that" she said as she rose to address the room.

"Nothing embarrassing, I promise" Adam begged "I just want to show that no one is immune."

Bunny rose, feeling slightly trapped as she stood on the stage and Adam reached out, tapping her arm three times as he whispered something under his breath.

Bunny blinked.

"Now, you will sing 'You are my Sunshine' for us all" Adam demanded and Bunny blinked again, glancing at Jack who seemed to think it was funny. She decided to let him keep his illusion and she sang it loud and clear, then as she finished another voice rang out.

"I think that's enough. Bunny is special, don't pick on her!" shouted one of the waitresses from the café, others adding their agreement.

Adam nodded reaching for her arm, three taps and he said "When I say Valhalla you will be released."

"Valhalla."

She made a show of looking around and blinking, everyone cheering as she demanded to know if she laid an egg too.

Laughter as she went back to her seat and Jack leaned in, "You were lovely up there. Very nice."

The drive home was in silence and she kept glancing at Jack with confusion. Something was off and she couldn't work out quite what.

As much as they had enjoyed the evening Jack seemed almost annoyed.

Bunny wished they hadn't gone.


	3. who comes knocking?

They were settling for bed with Bunny wafting through the bedroom to remove herself when she paused and leaned in for a kiss, surprised when Jack pulled away.

Now she was confused.

"Cariad?"

"Tired, just … ah." Jack seemed confused as well, "Sorry love. Just not in the mood."

"Oh. OK" she said as she went though and sat before her mirror, removing the makeup with gentle calm, then pulling on some old PJs. Obviously not a night for cuddles then.

Ianto went to his side of the bed and clambered in, then Jack was there plastered behind him "Hey handsome."

"I thought .." Ianto was beyond confused and it actually felt nice to know he was still attractive to his husband even if Bunny was a bit too much effort when tired. At least Ianto was worth a nice cuddle.

"Goodnight my love" Jack whispered in the dark and they settled.

.

.

.

Ianto stared at the man with confusion, not expecting company so early in the morning let alone Adam and Rod coming up behind him as the front gate swing shut.

"Here to see Bunny and Jack" Rod said and Ianto stepped aside, glad the kids were already off on their horses with their Poppa and Nan for the day. For some reason he knew Jerry would not like this either.

"Please come in, Bunny is not currently here" Ianto led them to the kitchen where Jack was swinging on the chair and he let it slam to the floor, surprised as well.

"Hey guys, coffee? Ianto? Coffee?" Jack said excitedly as he waved them to a chair and Ianto rose to get coffee as Francine leaned back with a raised eyebrow.

"Ever since the thing last night he has been a bit weird. He didn't want to kiss Bunny, he seems to think I am some sort of … well. I don't know" Ianto frowned, "I think I did something to annoy him as Bunny but I do not understand what."

"Not like him" Francine agreed with surprise.

"Here we are then" Ianto said as he returned and Jack swung to him.

"Quinn, go get Quinn so they can meet him, yeah?" Jack asked excitedly and Ianto looked at Adam who was still sitting with his hand on Jack's arm. Ianto went to see if the little man was awake and returned to find Adam had moved into his chair and was now between Jack and Ianto's.

"Here he is, my little cherub. Ianto here is a wonder, not all child minders are as caring" Jack said and Ianto was about to ask what the hell he meant by that when Jack then demanded, "Go get Bunny. They came to see her."

Francine had abandoned her place and followed Ianto up, "Something weird happened when you left the room. He leaned in and said something to Jack that made him go … sort of slack"

"He hypnotised him last night, tried to get Bunny but was not able to. Of course someone who has my level of empathic ability can't be. I pretended it worked so he would look OK but I think he believes it. Something weird is going on here, I've had a bad feeling about him ever since he turned up" Ianto agreed, "That Adam gives off a vibe … something about him that is familiar. I wish Jerry were here."

"What are you going to do?" she asked and Ianto frowned.

"I have a weird feeling, have had it ever since they came out of nowhere like they had a mission. I want to see how far this will go." He said as he considered things, "They have an agenda. I want to know what it is."

"Well, they keep it up and someone might shoot them" Francine growled as Ianto pulled her into a hug.

"Control yourself you mad mama" he scolded, a kiss to show he appreciated her anger on his behalf, "I won't let this go too far, I just think the puppet master isn't showing his face yet."

As Francine left Ianto frowned and said softly "Or hers."

.

.

.

.

Bunny arrived, everyone lighting up as Adam moved to pull out a chair for her, "Ah, sweetheart. I thought you were never coming down"

"I do not do mornings" she purred, "Bunnies like to play at dusk you know."

As Jack and Rod talked Adam leaned in and tapped Bunny's arm three times. She tried not to react as she now knew for sure he was trying to control them through the hypnosis.

Interesting.

"You belong to me" Adam hissed, then he tapped again before leaning back as Bunny stared at him with shock.

What?

She hadn't expected that.

Hang on ….

If she belonged to him …..

Who got Jack?

Now things were getting interesting.


	4. Startled Rabbit

Bunny sat trying to look pleased as Adam sat with an arm around her, Jack's confused expression not helping much. Rod had made a call and now as the doorbell rang he leapt up to race to get it, Bunny watching with growing dread as that voice in the back of her mind whispered who is was out there.

Bitch.

Rod entered and Jack rose from his chair, his anger thrumming but Adam was there, tapping his arm and speaking softly. Gwen flounced in looking at Bunny with triumph, then sat as Jack rushed to settled next to her "Gwen, where were you? I've been waiting here for bloody hours."

"Had to look my best for you, husband" she purred and Bunny felt her hackles rise, looking away so it didn't show as Adam sat to rub his hand on her leg.

"Well, lovebirds shouldn't be apart, should they" he said as he looked at Bunny, "My wife and I definitely know the satisfaction of a good afternoon delight, maybe after lunch we should all take some … ah …. Siesta time."

Really?

Bunny smiled sweetly at him, "Before then sweetie, I need to go powder me nose."

"Sweet bunny nose" he leaned in and kissed her, then she shot from the room and took a deep breath as she imagined killing Gwen in all sorts of different ways. Then she took a deep breath and settled herself, picking up the phone.

"Maureen? Hi, it's Bunny. Did you record the show last night? Yes, that was funny. Yes. Wonderful. Any chance I can get you to email a copy over?" Bunny purred as she pulled her purse over and rifled around for her phone. She checked it, "Ah. Lovely ta sweetie."

Bunny then played it back, watching for the point where Adam leaned back and spoke the magic word to release them all.

Gotcha.

.

.

.

.

Gwen was still preening in Jack's lap, Quinn sitting in hers like a little teddy bear, his face a picture of alarm as this strange lady tried to kiss him. He did what any toddler would do.

He screamed.

Bunny shot in to swoop him up and Adam rose, "Now love. You know he needs discipline. Go get the bloody nanny, here the hell is he?"

Bunny took a breath, "I will go find him. Jack, maybe you should carry your child?"

"Yeah" Jack leapt up, "Right."

She led him out of the room and down the hall, then turned as he entered the room and then closed the door. He turned with surprise, "Bunny?"

"Phone" she said as she held out her cell phone, "A message. Push play."

Jack did as he was told, her power over him still more than the red headed freak could ever achieve and as he listened to the release word his face changed to one of total fury.

"Jack. We…" Bunny whispered as Jack lowered the phone and glared at her.

"What the fuck is this?" he demanded, holding out the phone and she remembered Adam whispering something to him on the stage no one else could hear … a back-up plan?

"Who am I?" she asked gently.

"Bunny."

"And?"

"and?" he repeated.

"And Ianto. Remember? I am your husband. Your wife. Your love. We have a baby together, we have a life together" she said as she stepped closer, "Jack fight it. Adam has put a suggestion in your head that the release word hasn't removed. You wouldn't kiss me last night? Something about me? A feeling? Wait."

She tore off her wig and hair net, then reached for tissues to scrub at her face and Jack seemed to waiver, then gasped, "Ianto. Shit. You're right. As Bunny you … made me feel … shit. I mean … like enraged. Like you had wronged me but as yourself … it's gone."

"Bastard" Ianto snarled, "Gwen must have forgotten to explain that we are both one person. By locking out Bunny it made no sense that Ianto wasn't either. He obviously doesn't know."

"He soon will, as soon as Gwen realises it she will give it up" Jack frowned, "Son of a whore."

"Jerry" Ianto looked out the window, "They're coming back Go head them off and … shit. Look at me. Between. I can't go out … gods. I will shoot up the stairs with Quinn, you head out there and tell Jerry what is happening. I will lock Quinn in the bedroom where he is safe with Franny and you fucking get rid of her. Preferably in a deep hole somewhere."

"Deal" Jack handed over the toddler who sighed with relief as he seized onto his beloved and Ianto checked the coast was clear then ran upstairs to wait for Francine when Jack would send her up, Jack slipping outside to warn Jerry and get a hold of the rifle as well. Ianto headed for his room to remove the Bunny tracing.

It was all going to be OK.

Ianto was sure of it as he turned the key in the lock and turned to find …

Gwen sitting on the end of the bed.

Well ….

Fuck.


	5. pop

"Where's Jack?" she demanded.

"Downstairs" Ianto said as he slid towards the dressing room but Gwen rose to intercept, showing the Webley she had taken from the gunsafe.

Right.

Of course she knew his code, bloody idiot hadn't changed it, had he. His birthday. Of course she knew it.

"And where are you going?"

"Nappy change, unless you want to do his dirty nappy. You will need some perfume first, for the nose" Ianto grinned and she made a face as she looked down at the baby, then motioned and Ianto shot in, slamming the door before Gwen could react.

"BITCH!" Gwen screamed as she raised the gun and fired at the door.

Quinn screamed and Ianto hit the floor, sliding into the nearest closet and pulling the door shut as well. The doors were solid, he was sure they were safe so he shakily pulled over a makeup back and removed his makeup as Quinn settled to a soft grizzle and paw through the jewellery bag next to it.

Ianto could hear shouting and then another shot, this time downstairs and Gwen screamed with rage, another shot. This time she had the brains to aim for the wall, not the oak door and Ianto felt dust falling, looking up to see daylight above him.

Fuck, that one got through.

Ianto reached out to check the gun locker was still between him and the bitch, relieved to find he had remembered right and he lay down so the locker was higher than him and Quinn, the little man now dripping with paste jewellery as he looked at a tiara with interest.

"Not the earrings, you might swallow one" Ianto muttered as he began pulling them out, then giggling at the absurdity of it, locked in the closet sorting bling with the boy.

Then a loud boom that was unmistakably the shotgun, in the next room.

Quinn stopped playing with the jewels as his eyes got big and he made a Ooooooo sound with wonder.

"Poppa Jerry is home" Ianto whispered and the baby Ooooo'd again and grinned as he agreed.

"Ianto?"

Jack.

Ianto rose and went to the door, "Is she gone?"

"Downstairs tied up with the others. Jerry wants to count crow." Jack called back and Ianto slid the bolt back to let him in, the clutch and searing kiss welcome too.

"Are you OK?" Ianto asked as he checked Jack over.

"Yeah, Adam hits like a girl" Jack laughed, "Rod tried to run. Francine took to him with the carpet beater. Funniest damned thing I ever saw."

"Quinn is blinging out" Ianto said as they returned to find the little boy holding out an arm covered with bracelets making them jangle.

"Wow, look at you" Jack crooned as he lifted him up, "Pretty."

Quinn grinned back and waved his arm some more, "Come on prince bling monster let's go see what Poppa caught with the big gun, yeah?"

Then went down and Adam stared at Ianto who realised he was still in Bunny's clothes so he canted his head.

"Problem? This isn't my colour?" he said in Bunny's voice.

"Shit. You stupid bitch, you didn't say he was her, Christ. Of course. If I knew, I could have…"

"Nothing." Ianto spat, "You could have nothing. I was never under your influence, I just wanted her. And behold. The beast slopes towards Bethlehem to be born."

"I beg your…" Gwen spluttered but the slap silenced her.

"Not the first time I hit a woman, first time as a man though. Funny, feels just the same" Ianto said conversationally to Jack who snorted.

"Quinn" Jack crooned, swinging him around.

"Cariad, maybe you should take him out to Gloria and the kids, let them know it's safe to come in the house?" Ianto suggested and Jack grunted as he walked away still crooning at the baby.

"Adam. Neat trick. Nice" Jerry said as he accepted a cup of coffee form Francine, "Your problem is the fact you don't know all the players or their place on the board. Gwen has used you, you thought you were winning something but really she just dragged you down. If you want to save yourself I suggest you tell me where John is."

"Who?"

Jerry grinned as he rose, "No bother. Mathew is due home tonight. We will just pop you all out in the barn's cellar and he can talk to you when he gets back."

"You can't do that!" Gwen spluttered, "You can't keep us against our will. That's kidnapping, do you think we won't tell?"

"Tell?" Jerry said with surprise, "Why little lady. What makes you think you will get the chance to tell anyone what is about to happen to you? There is an old saying that is still apt here."

Jerry leaned in close "Dead men tell no tales."

Gwen paled as Jerry turned to watch Francine return to the kitchen with her boy in tow, Dee-Dee looking like hell was coming.

Ianto decided to go change.

It was going to be a long day.


	6. seen and heard

Ianto didn't care where they took them and didn't care, he just hoped they would stay in whatever hole they wound up in. He never thought he could feel so … separated from things but really he didn't care.

"Sweetheart" Jack said softly, watching from the doorway and Ianto realised he had been hugging himself. Ianto moved to him and leaned into his arms, letting Jack engulf him.

"Shower?" Jack asked softly, "I need to wash a bitch off."

They stood under the hot water soaping each other and exploring the familiar landscapes as Ianto silently worried about Jack's reactions with Bunny. Were they over? Or would he react the same way next time he needed her for a release?

After the shower he went in search of Jerry and quietly told him of his fears and Jerry nodded, promising he would pass it on to 'the boy' and they would make sure before they were finished what all the release words were.

Once again Ianto knew he should feel some level of … and….but he didn't. His anger was still there, Quinn's little face still showing signs of confusion as he put his little arms up for extra comfort. For a little one who had been content to sit on the floor with toys, it was not exactly favourable to suddenly have a limpet. Although too young to understand what had been happening, he had obviously felt Ianto's fear.

"Let me take him for a while" Gloria offered but the little man whimpered and hung on even tighter with wide eyes.

"Poor little lamb, still upset" she sighed as she settled back to show him that he would not take him from his favourite person.

"Maybe a walk in town in the monster buggy. Some harmless pretend people killing and he will feel more himself" Ianto surmised, "Although part of me wants to hide I know getting out and about will help with the notion that everything is OK. They will come up missing sooner or later and if we hide more it might be remembered. Being seen as fine and out will make people remember we were in town, not somewhere they might be."

"Yes, you're right there son" Jerry nodded, "Act a normal as possible. The little guy will love some Café madness and then a walk to the playground to watch the kids pay and throw some breadcrumbs for those ducks he is so fond of."

"Actually, that sounds lovely. I'll come too. Davey and Mimi need some extra school things so we have an excuse." Gloria pointed out and they all nodded as Quinn looked up into Ianto's face and hooted, getting lifted to his feet so he could stroke Ianto's face and hair.

"Quite the little lover" Gloria smiled, "Look."

"Maybe he's doing hair and makeup" Jack chortled, "A little artist in the making already saying he needs a little colour."

They all laughed as the tension eased and Ianto hugged the little guy against him as Quinn hummed happily, the smell of Ianto's hair interesting now.

Soon they were in town moving through the crowds as Quinn did the mad Man Growls and people watched him trying to get them with little snarls and swings of his wheel.

"He is so aggressive" One pointed out in the dairy, "So much like his father. Gray was a vicious little bugger sometimes. Oh, Captain, I didn't mean…."

"It's OK. Remember the time he hit me in the head with a baseball bat?" Jack laughed, "He was only four or five. Hell of a whack, bled like a stuck pig."

"Oh I remember that" Annabelle said, placing her shopping basket down as she turned to face Jack, the elderly lady had been his teacher once upon a time, "You wore your hat to hide the damage. I commented on how like your father you looked. So handsome. This little one is so much like you CJ. You are such a handsome man."

"Yes" Ianto smiled softly, "Isn't he just?"

"Look who's talking" she giggled, "If I were twenty years younger …."

"Oh hush now!" Ianto snorted, "You know, I like being a boy toy."

Everyone laughed as Quinn screamed to let them know he wanted the toy, whatever it was and Jack crouched to show him a squeaky chicken from the shelf they had stopped by in the pet section.

"Cariad, I think that's a dog toy" Ianto frowned and Jack shrugged.

"So? Little bugger is part animal I think, yeah?" Jack crooned as Quinn growled and shook the toy, then put it in his mouth to show he knew what they were saying.

"Oh, so you are a doggie now?" Jack laughed

Quinn growled happily with the chicken in his mouth and to Ianto's horror Jack started pushing the carriage along the sidewalk with the little boy sitting proudly with the chicken in his mouth while holding his wheel.

"So … everyone will remember we were in town today for certain now" Ianto sighed softly, people laughing and waving as Quinn snarled around his chicken.

Harkness side, the Jones side kept the safe hands both on the wheel.


	7. Elephants

"Are you OK son?" Jerry asked as Ianto poked at the evening meal, the kids eating with gusto before racing off upstairs to see what goodies had been purchased in town, Jack a soft touch for gifts despite Ianto's' scolding which meant bags were now on beds.

Ianto was now sitting with Quinn in his lap moving the food around his plate a little Quinn happily shoving his baby spoon into the gravy and then licking it with hums of happiness, the bowl of mash already long gone.

"Are you OK love? You want me to take him?" Gloria offered as she watched the baby smear the gravy across his face now. Ianto looked at her with surprise, then down at the beast and snorted, handing him over.

"Actually, I think I might go up for a bath and then early bed if you don't mind, the last few days have been tiresome" Ianto rose and headed up, deciding to put his theory to the test as he shaved and primped, then sat before the mirror to look pretty before bed.

Bunny settled in the sheets, her best nightie and she knew she looked delectable, even pouting her lips as the door opened and she watched Jack look, grimace and then shoot into the bathroom with obvious distain, "Sorry love. Just gotta take a dump."

Bunny rose and sadly sat to remove the makeup and wig, returning to Ianto before getting back in the bed in old PJs. Jack came out and shot into the bed, then smiled, "Awww, my darling love."

Jack snuggled against him to sleep and Ianto knew Adam had definitely made some subconscious suggestion that Bunny was unattractive to him.

He hoped like hell Jerry could get it out of the prick.

.

.

.

.

"He gave us three" Jerry said as he watched Ianto's hands wring in his lap, "He is still alive in case he was lying. At this stage he really wants it all to stop."

"And Rod?"

"He saw what happens otherwise as we used Rod to show him" Jerry snorted, "My boy is still with them now. Have the recording of the triggers here."

Jerry handed over a Dictaphone and Ianto nodded his thanks as Jack slumped into a chair, "Whatcha doing?"

"Jerry has just given me a recording of triggers to release those Adam hypnotised" Ianto explained.

"Yeah, good thing you knew mine" Jack grinned.

Ianto started the recording and he watched Jack's face.

"Lemony"

"Hysterectomy"

"Weird" Jack huffed, "Why pick words like that?"

Ianto waited for the last one with open hope.

"Hephalump"

Heffalump" Jack repeated softly, "Now… that's an elephant right? The elephant in the room. Huh."

"I think that was the one" Ianto whispered and Jerry nodded as Ianto turned to address his husband, "Jack? Will you wait here a sec?"

Ianto rose and let the room, Jack turning to Jerry with a frown, "Is he OK?"

"I think so. Weird words so he wouldn't accidentaly say them in an everyday conversation." Jerry replied as he accepted coffee from Francine. "Qinny with Glo?"

"Yeah, she's enjoying some squeeze time" Jerry smiled then watched Bunny swishing into the room.

"Hey babe!" Jack lit up rising to greet her with his hands sliding around the corseted waist, "Long tome no squeeze."

"Stop it" she giggled as he leaned in and cuddled against her, kissing her neck. She looked over Jack's shoulder at Jerry with relief as they now knee one of the trigger words had released Jack form his dislike for her.

"Now, gonna tell me what's happening here?" Jack asked.

Jerry spoke as Bunny held him, the explosive reaction not unexpected as Jack showed his anger and remorse, begging forgiveness and proclaiming his undying love for her and her pretty self.

"It's OK Cariad" she crooned, "I am sure Gwen was behind that idea."

"Gwen?" Jerry asked then frowned, "You know, he didn't even mention her on the phone."

He rose and went to the other room, returning with a pale face.

"What is it?" Ianto asked softy.

"She's gone. He didn't' know who I was even talking about" Jerry sighed, "Just the two men there. He is taking care of… cleanup and then coming back. We will talk to him and work out what happened."

"I bet I know" Bunny growled, "Bitch made sure she had an exit strategy."

"I can't believe it, after all this she got away again?" Jack wailed, "Has she got a deal with the Devil?"

"Think she is one" Bunny muttered as she lost her appetite and shoved away the piece of cake Francine had tried to tempt her with. "Gods, I am pissed now!"

"Me too" Jack called after her, rising to follow.

Jerry sat looking at Gloria with annoyance, "I suggest we amp the security for a few days mother. This might not bode well."

"Whatever you think love" she nodded, then she rose to check the babies.

Nervous now she knew Gwen was loose once again.

Jerry sat for a long time staring at the darkening sky outside.

Next time he would kill the bitch.

No matter what.


	8. release?

Mathew came back and they settled in the main room, the fire crackling as Quinn played on his mat. Mathew looked genuinely confused as he sat watching everyone pace but Ianto had an idea, sitting and keying up the recording on his phone from the live night.

"Gwen who?" he said yet again, blinking as his family tried to understand how Gwen had managed this.

"He hypnotised you" Jerry explained yet again as he rubbed Mathew's arm to show there was no anger in this betrayal, "Gwen convinced him to tell you to not see her, or forget her if she gave a certain trigger word. He was such an arrogant fool it never occurred to him to do the same for his own safety. I guess he never thought he would be in danger and was just humouring her. She was probably shagging him stupid."

"But … I don't get it" Mathew shook his head, "I don't trick easily. When the hell would he have the chance?"

"Maybe at the bar before the show, when we all just met" Jack pondered, "You were there that night. He was touchy feely then too, Bunny didn't like him one little bit."

"I've not known her to be wrong yet" Mathew sighed sadly as he slumped.

"This was Jack's trigger and for some reason it was not on the recording you provided" Ianto explained as he fiddled with the phone, "I have a feeling this is why."

"What is why?" Mathew trusted Ianto, had no reason not to so he sat and waited patiently until Ianto handed him the phone.

"Listen to this"

Mathew obediently did and Jack knew the feeling, Mathew's face changing from confusion to shock, then anger and horror, "No. No, no, no. Shit."

"You let her go, didn't you" Ianto said softly and Mathew sighed.

"A vehicle arrived and she told me it was time for her to go. I … simply let her. The guys were yelling and she turned to tell them that it sucked to be them then swanned off" he moaned. "I did it. Just … let her go."

"It's Ok. This is not your fault. Gwen is smart, so smart." Ianto sighed.

"Sly as a shit-house rat" Jerry muttered and Quinn looked up from the floor with interest.

"Potty mouth Poppa" Ianto said softly as Quinn listened, Jerry grimacing as he turned to the look down at the toddler now patting his foot lovingly.

"Poppa said a bad word. We need to start you a swear jar, eh young man?" he crooned and Quinn smiled, the angry voice gone and his lovely Poppa back. Much better.

"Tatatatata" Quinn said with arms up, Ianto rising to scoop him up and kiss him as he swung him around.

"You beast" he crooned, kissing chubby cheeks.

"I think Ianto and I need a little time" Jack said after a while, "Just us as a family. How about we take the kids on a little holiday love? Go to an amusement park, spend a couple of nights in a posh hotel? Yeah? This weekend? Leave Friday and be back Sunday night or Monday."

Ianto swung to look at him with surprise and Micha stepped out from behind one of the chairs, "I wanna stay with Granny and Poppa. My horse needs me."

"Your horse huh?" Jack grinned, "Not that little muster Poppa was talking about the other day that happens at the weekend?"

"I'm helping too" David said and they all turned to find him under the desk.

"OK. What the hell!" Ianto laughed, "Get here!"

"You kids spying on us?" Jack asked with surprise.

"We don't wanna go. Everyone is annoyed and whispering and it usually means we have to go" David explained, "I don't wanna leave. The muster is important and Pops said we could do some riding and roping."

"I been practicing!" Micha agreed.

"Well, I guess that's up to Poppa and Granny." Ianto said as he watched two older heads nod.

"So, me, Jack and the beast?" Ianto smiled, "That sounds nice too."

"I know just the place then, not a big amusement park that might scare him. There is a place with animals. Rabbits and stuff running about. Ducks and stuff to feed, a little nature land thing" Jack was already moving away to look it up and Ianto smiled as his lovely husband sought comfort for their child before themselves.

As it should be.

Ianto started to mentally pack, his mind going over things and he was surprised to find Bunny wanted a lot of things. After all, they were going as a family and it felt nice to think they would go somewhere that didn't know Ianto/Bunny so she could just be Mum for the weekend.

Maybe.


	9. ahoy

"And we used a fake name" Ianto asked for the third time in as many minutes.

"Yes love. This cruise is under the radar honest" Jack nodded, "You, me and the sprog. And all the water in the world between us and civilisation"

Ianto looked up at the cruise ship bobbing in the water, the holiday both needed and so sweetly wanted. Their honeymoon. They really, really needed one and this was going to cement their relationship without the outside influences of others.

We hope.

Ianto turned in time to see their bags going up in the wharf-side lift, the dresses visible as a gust of wind lifted on to reveal the flounce of the pink ball gown he probably didn't really need.

"Come on love, let's go" Jack said as he let his hand slide to the small of Ianto's back and they walked up the gangplank to board, their tickets shown as Quinn waved happily to the people looking at him, apparently waving goodbye to the family had been fun as it was agreed to avoid the tearful wharf-side goodbye as it might also be easier to have others notice them.

Jack knew Ianto was on edge, this Gwen thing had muddied the water and he hopes some massages and cocktails might help … he-he… cocktails….stop it. Jack cleared his throat as Ianto swung to give him that stare that told him he knew he was sniggering at some silly joke in his own head again so Jack waggled his eyebrows and followed Ianto as they were led to their cabin.

Ianto walked to the window and looked out, surprised to find it was not round like he thought then he snorted at himself as he chastised himself for being so childish. It was lux all the way, the bathroom had gold taps for the love of the gods, it was so sweet and wonderful that he thought he might just spend the entire cruise in the room. Of course he knew Jack wouldn't let him, the nonstop gushing about the movie theatre, the pool and five different restaurants had shown his desire to try them all. At only five days on board it meant eating out every night and Ianto glanced at the bags hanging on the wardrobe and he mentally worked out how many of those would be as Bunny. He was looking forward to it.

A little squeal had him turning to watch the resident spawn shuffle across the floor to try to reach the TV screen that was too high thank the gods.

"Come on you beast" Ianto laughed, "Come look for Dadda. Where is he? Wheeeerrreeeees Dada!"

He jumped around the doorframe where Jack was unpacking the toilet bags and Jack laughed as he saw the little face looking at him with glee, "Oh no. you found me!"

Quinn laughed hysterically and he reached for him and Jack cuddled him for a kiss.

"Well then, a walk around the deck?" Jack asked "Like a bit of Deck, me."

"Stop it!" Ianto scolded, "what if he stats thinking that's a normal comment."

"Baby, you know that is nothing to what his first sentence will probably be" Jack replied, "Come on. With us around him all the time? And the 'girls' too?"

Ianto nodded and they walked down to the elevators, then stepped in, stepping out in the main area where it was teaming with life. No one that knew them or cared a damn. Ianto felt so happy as he turned to kiss Jack. Not caring who saw.

Quinn squealed so Jack squeezed him and kissed him before handing him to Ianto and going over to get a map.

"There was a welcome pack back in the room, you said we didn't have time!" Ianto scolded and then he smiled as he knew Jack wanted it to be fun, "You better not drop breadcrumbs to find our way back mister I think they frown on that around here."

Jack laughed as he jiggled the baby and they walked around looking in stores and feeling the gentle hum of the large engines behead their feet as they took a tour of the lower decks to see the working engines. Jack was loving it and Ianto find himself grinning like a fool more than once as Jack gushed about being surrounded by seamen.

They got back to the room as Quinn flopped in Jack's arms, totally spent. Jack placed him down, crooning as he stroked the little man's face and hair, totally in love with the little man who had given him so much before he was even born.

Jack was so looking forward to this.


	10. pondering

Karaoke.

Of course Bunny was all in and Jack watched with glee as she strutted her stuff, several people including crew recognising her and going right off as she sang her sweet heart out.

Jack was beyond proud as more than one person commented on his wonderful wife and her pipes. He thanked them as he agreed she was wonderful.

Oh Gods, drink" she gasped as she danced over and reached for the glass, necking it with glee as people gaped then she slammed the glass down "Another Cariad?"

Jack got up and then saw one coming so he settled back as a steward set it down, "Lovely singing there missus."

"I love singing" she said happily, taking a large mouthful, "doesn't half get me thirsty though."

"You don't half know how to move" a voice said then "Captain?"

Jack turned and laughed as he rose from the chair, You have got to be joking. Of all the gin joints!"

"You old dog you" the man laughed, "I can't believe it. Wow. What are you doing here?"

"My lovely partner and I are having a holiday" Jack said as he gestured at Ianto, "Our little boy is asleep in the cabin with one of those excitable stewards watching him for us. Probably trying on Bunny's dresses."

"Wow" the man stared at Bunny with wide eyes "How the hell did you manage to catch such a pretty one?"

"This is Bunny" Jack said happily, "My wife."

"Wow"

She raised an eyebrow and Jack finally remembered his manners, "Sweetheart, this is Ham, my friend from school"

"Still at school" Ham grinned, "I'm the Headmaster there now, on my own honeymoon."

"The local school? Where the kids are going?" Jack asked.

"I would hope so, would be a pretty silly school without any" Ham laughed happily.

"My niece and nehew" Ianto said suddenly, "My sister married Jack's brother. Then they died and we have adopted their children. Jack is naturally thinking we are in his head again, Mica and David are school age."

"Mica, pretty" Ham nodded, "Your voice changed then, you hide an accent."

"My love hides more than that" Jack laughed, "Bunny is …well…everything I ever wanted."

"Wow" he liked that word.

"Ham?" Bunny canted her head, letting the glitter on her eyelashes glimmer at him.

"Hamburger. When we were kids I just wanted hamburgers" he shrugged, "All I would eat at lunch and after school."

"Makes sense" she nodded, taking another good mouthful.

"So, what are….wait. The kids are coming to my school? You live back at home? Christ on a pogo stick your mother must be happy" he snorted, "A good woman and kids."

Jack laughed, so happy as he slapped the table, "Yeah. She loves Bunny."

Ham seemed to be looking closely at Bunny, leaning in as he frowned and for a moment she wondered if a lash had come off or something, shifting uncomfortably.

"You don't play an instrument or two? Er… do you teach at all?"

"Excuse me?" Ianto barked and Ham jumped as the manly voice issued forth, leaning back with wide eyes.

"My love made a living professionally, singing in some swanky places. Can pay the guitar and piano, sings like a little bird even if she is a Bunny Rabbid" Jack nodded.

"That's where I've seen you before, shit. Bunny Rabid. Huh. I read that spread on you in the Tattler. You are quite the enigma….oh wow. Jack Harkness you shit, you got the whole package. Wow. A real Drag Queen" he slumped as he grinned and shook his head.

"So now you know why I cannot teach your children" Bunny sighed.

"Ianto could though" Jack blurted out, "Everyone loves Ianto, babe you can. I dare anyone to say you are anything less than perfect."

"Jack!"

"No, no he's right. If you are comfortable in male form you would be perfect for the position. I need someone for music as well as to fill in the other classes now and then. Come on, part time….like three classes a week? Tell me you have excellent grades right? Some degree in something?" Ham looked ready to beg as Bunny frowned at Jack.

"Come on… you know you are thinking about it" he whispered. "You know you graduated Head Boy!"

"I don't know. The stinker … your mama will love that idea" she sighed, then rubbed her hand on Jack's arm affectionately, "I will think about it. I need to chew it over."

"Not a problem, we are all on this cruise together" Ham said, "If you will excuse me, I need to go find my wife. She was going to get some air."

As he left the table Bunny looked at her drink as her nails tinged against the glass.

Ianto could do that ya know. He did have a degree in English Lit.

* * *

 


	11. texas hold'em

Ianto woke to giggling and knew before he opened his eyes there was a little stink on the pillow with his face so close he could kiss him. So he did.

He then smiled at his little son, "Hey Quinny monster."

Quinn grinned back happily.

"Morning love" Jack leaned over their baby to kiss him good morning, the scent of shampoo and soap filled his nostrils as he breathed his love in, and that spicy undertone that made him wish he had woke earlier to join him in that shower before the bean woke up.

"What's on the cards today?" Jack asked as he yawned.

"Docking at some island today, maybe a walk around the market?" Ianto asked, "I might like some solid ground under me feet."

"Sounds like a plan" Jack smiled and lifted the baby up, letting Ianto stretch and yawn as well.

"Well, I need a shower too, I'll meet you in the dining room" Ianto said as he watched Jack place the baby into his pushchair and they took off, leaving him to shower and get dressed. He decided to be himself, feeling not only safe but wanting to be stronger in a strange place. Bunny might not be taken seriously s a haggler and he definitely wanted some baubles for Mimi and something big and fierce for Davy.

He decided against a suit, taking Jack's lead and wearing a soft tan leather jacket over some chocolate trousers, a plain white shirt and his watch. He slid on some tan loafers and then wandered to the dining room where he found Jack and the Captain laughing as they watched the baby clapping and cooing at a floral display.

"Hey babe, look. He likes the birds of paradise ones" Jack said happily, "He likes colour."

"Well, we all like a little colour sometimes" Ianto agreed as he accepted Jack's hand and stood watching the little one's eyes drink in the bright colours.

They headed down the gangplank and Ianto let Jack take the baby as they neared the market and Ianto saw the first nice beaded trinkets, smiling as he talked and fingered things, a little handbag of carved leather, the image of a horse on it appealing as he knew she would love it, then he saw a jacket with some hand embroidered fringe David's size there.

Jack stood with Quinn watching Ianto gather things, his glee as he found more things that were perfect making Jack smile and he didn't even haggle too hard as the pleasure in watching Ianto was worth any price, then across the way he saw them waving out, "Hey Ham!"

They were moving towards them Ianto still excitedly checking bags when Ham's wife turned to face them and Jack stopped dead with surprise, "Eleanor?"

"Well now, Captain is that you?" she drawled with surprise as he looked at Ianto in a most disturbingly….embarrassed way that had Ianto canting his head as he realised he was meeting another ex.

Great, another Bunny Boiler perhaps.

Then as she smiled and bent to speak to Quinn Ianto realised it don't matter, he had won Jack and nothing could change it as the look of adoration was not for her…it was directed at him as Jack told them they were about to get a bite to eat and inviting them to join.

Over the meal Ianto learnt that she was a flash in the pan kinda flame…not the skin peeling one Gwen was and he found himself liking her brashness and Texan style attitude, "So, how did you get the Ham?"

She looked at Ianto and smiled softly, "Well, I won him of course. Have me a Texan standoff with this big titted bitch who had been after him for a while and…"

"Gwen!" Jack spluttered, "Tell me…it was her right?"

"Yep, after you left she seemed to go off her fucking gourd..shit, pardon" she placed her hand over her mouth to look at the sleeping kid in Jack's lap as he laughed and waved his hand for her to continue, "She thought it was like Grease the musical or something and she was sandy gonna get the guy. Well honey, believe you me … she soon learnt that her head still fit in the toilet bowl! Yes sir!" she sapped the table as Ham nodded enthusiastically.

"She screamed all the way down the hallway, man ya shoulda seen it, this one waltzed out and snogs me." Ham sighed, "Mind, some of the parents were a bit cross, it was a parent-teacher night."

Ianto blinked, "What…this wasn't high school?"

"Well honey bun, it did happen IN the high school but Ham here was the English teacher at the time. I was the Girl's Sports Coach." Elle … just call me Elle, laughed.

Ianto leaned back in the chair and smiled, "Well now … I think I may have found me a new daydream, tell me. Did the gap in her teeth catch any loo paper?"

Elle roared with mirth as she slapped the table again, "Laws, you roped yourself a goodun there Captain."

"Yeah" Jack sighed happily, "I sure did."


	12. sarong for the ride

"So?" Jack asked as he rocked the little boy in his arms, watching Ianto stuff clothes into the laundry bag, "You decided?"

"I can do a trial, see how it goes I guess" Ianto nodded as he glanced up at him, "Maybe a couple days a week, Quinn wouldn't mind that. Don't want him to pine."

"I love you" Jack blurted, then cleared his throat, "I meant to say … that sounds good."

Ianto snorted, "Silly man."

"You think you can fit any more treasures, last island tomorrow" Jack glanced at the bags already heaving with stuff for everyone, even the staff.

"Oh gods no love" Ianto snorted, "I was sort of thinking of sitting this last one out. Maybe enjoy the deck chairs while we don't have people on board hogging them…actually thinking Bunny might like to sunbathe in that little one piece."

Jack grinned as he straightened up, "Yeah? The red one with the pretty sarong?"

"Yep"

"Lovely, Quinn here will be happy anywhere there is his tablet" Jack yawned, then frowned "Is he too young for that? I worry letting him watch it .. is it bad for his little eyes."

"Not like it's all the time" Ianto soothed, "Parents that don't' make sure their children do other things as well let them down, we let him watch a movie then we play and go see things, his eyes get a rest. Besides, way of the future. One day we will all be in spaceships and they will be born with the ability to text without looking at the buttons."

Jack sighed at the logic, "I think I would be a rubbish space man."

"Because of the farting?"

"Hey! Because I would miss you" Jack grabbed at him as Ianto laughed and slapped him away, then leaned in for a kiss.

"Come on. Bed."

"I am glad you like Ham, not everyone does." Jack said as he snuggled in, a beast in there with them.

"He comes across as a nerd, sort of … clumsy but he has a good heart and a wicked sense of humor once he gets over his shyness" Ianto said softy, "I like them. I think they should come over for a meal when we get back, maybe some plans as couples."

"Yeah?" Jack grinned, "He is a great rider but she is scared of them."

"Perfect" Ianto snorted "We can hide with our margaritas while you men folk go off and ride about … with Mimi of course."

"She's such a little horsewoman, you know…. I have been thinking about teaching her some rodeo stuff. Barrel racing and such" Jack said, then came the long explanation of what he meant and he turned his head to find Ianto asleep, his eyelashes fluttering against his cheekbones as he rested, so handsome.

"Goodnight lover." Jack whispered happily as he tried to follow.

Always.

.

.

.

.

.

Elle saw Jack coming with the little boy in the pushchair and tapped Ham's arm "There we are!"

Ham spun and grinned, "Hey missed you today, not shopping?"

"No, we took in some sun" Jack smiled as he turned and a vision was wafting towards them, her gold coloured hair bouncing in large waves about her face, falling below her shoulders to curl around her breasts as those long legs seemed elongated with the four inch heels. The one piece swimsuit was pinched at the waist and the sarong hooked about the hips wafted out like a skirt and Jack called out, "Babe. They were looking for us."

"Well I did tell you to send them a message that we were not going ashore Cariad" the musical voice was soft and velvety, "Silly man."

"Yes love" Jack said enthusiastically as Quinn squealed and reached back.

"Mama"

She knelt, the silk puffing out around her to settle clinging to her and showing the nice arse. "What monster?"

Quinn made a kissy face and she laughed, leaning in to oblige and her hair slid forward, the burn mark on her upper arm it had covered now visible.

"Holy shit balls" Elle said softly, "Ianto?"

"Bunny" Jack corrected, "This is Ianto's other self she is Bunny Rabid the singer. She's internationally renowned ya know. Ham didn't warn ya?"

"Listen to him" Bunny tittered "Should be my agent."

"Wow I forgot" Ham said stupidly, as he stared at those lips now pursed as Bunny checked her lipstick in a compact, "Like…shit balls for sure I thought I had said."

"Well, the less said about my balls the better" Bunny quipped, winking as she added, "And don't even start about me shy willy eh?"

Ham roared with glee as his wife clapped and asked to know is it was true.

"What?" Bunny asked with a cant of her head.

"Do men really like pantyhose or is that a lie?" she demanded.

"Oh golly, they ride up something fierce and damn if your package isn't positioned right that seam cuts into you, damn!" Bunny flapped her hand over her crotch, "Not so much a tuck as a nip"

"Damn. I liked you, now I think I love you" Elle finally said with fake annoyance, "How am I ever gonna quit you?"

"Well, I am addictive" Bunny winked and smiled as laugher in the pushchair showed Quinn agrees, his hands out for another hiss.

Well now.

Cheeky.

OK.


	13. Perfect homecoming

Davie saw them first, his yelling over the crowd as he leapt up and down making Jack run as he left Ianto and raced down the gangplank to scoop up their big boy and hug him tightly. He then placed him on his feet and knelt as Mimi collapsed against him theatrically, "Oh Daddy."

He had never heard anything so sweet …. Apart from maybe Ianto's breathy cries of rapture.

"Missed you too" he whispered as he nuzzled her hair, apple shampoo filling his senses.

"What about me?" his mother demanded and he laughed rising to hug her as Ianto calmly traversed the crowd with the pushchair and finally the little boy could grin and hold up his arms for his Gran to pick him up and gush that she thought she would die if he took any longer.

Quinn decided that was a perfect comment really.

They were soon purring along with Ianto in the back cuddling with the two children who were gushing over all the photos he had taken, enjoying the ones Jack had taken of Bunny on stage and by the pool in repose.

Quinn was happy with his grandmother sitting with him as well, Jack up front happily talking with the driver who was laughing at the antics Jack was retelling, giving a fair imitation of Bunny's voice.

"So. What have I missed? Lots I bet" Ianto said as he squeezed David who looked up at him and snuggled closer.

"I fell of my horse but wasn't hurt. My bum got bruised and Micha laughed at me." He said, glaring across at her and she rolled her eyes.

"He fell off because he yelled at me and spooked the poor horse deserved it!" she retorted and the bickering began as Ianto settled happily to listen to them pretend not to like one another. He recognised this, him and Rhiannon also prone to it as children and he knew they loved one another fiercely.

"Well, if you hate one another so much how will we have the evening meal?" Ianto asked calmly, "Must you both eat in your rooms?"

The silence was deafening as they gaped then both started protesting, no doubt the meal going to be fantastic as everyone celebrated their return. The once it had died down he told the children about the job offer. After all, if they were uncomfortable with the thought of him teaching at their school he would not do it, they came first.

They both thought it was a brilliant idea, both thinking of their trips to school with him and time spent. Ianto was touched, knowing the time they spent with Jack was more due to the love of the horses and to know they did want to spend time with him as well was comforting.

"Well, seems decided then. I will go see them tomorrow" Ianto said happily as they pulled up to the house and Ianto sighed with relief. "Home. Feels so good to be home. I really want a bubble bath in my own tub"

"Sounds like a plan darling" Jack smiled as he watched Ianto rise from the vehicle and gracefully stretch. He was so handsome, a little more weight on than when they first met so he looked as strong as he truly was and Jack knew this handsome creature was his. He still had to pinch himself sometimes ya know.

"Right. Unpacking, gifts and then I need a bubble bath and soak the trip away. Quinn might like to come with…" Ianto glanced over and found the little boy clutching his Gran like she might disappear "..Or maybe he wants his own one with Granny supervising. Looks like he is happy to be back too."

"My little star" she gushed as she rushed off and Jack smiled, telling Ianto that was kind to give her that.

"Well. Plenty of him to go around" Ianto whispered as he leaned in for a kiss, Jack tasting Ianto's delight on their lips.

"Come on. We will freshen up and have a snack, go horrible heathens go tell Francine, go in. Shoo!" Jack said flapping his arms and the children ran off laughing as they were not usually allowed in the kitchen and today might be allowed to help carry all the platters of food if they asked politely. Someone else was happy they were home and had been cooking since early with worry the boat might sink or the car might crash. Such a worry wart. She had heard the car crunching up the drive and was now frantically icing some cream buns as the children crashed in and it was easier to provide a bin to each outstretched hand for peace. Really. Not a push over at all. Nope. Chocolates milk only given as it was a standard thing with ices bins ya know. Still the one in charge here! Really.

"Prefect" Micha said as she wiped at her chocolate moustache, "All back to normal!"

"Yeah" David agreed as he smiled at her over his own glass, "We are so lucky."

Francine stood back with a soft smile as she listened to the babies.

Perfect.


	14. nothing is ever simple is it

They had settled back into routines, Quinn pleased to get back to being worshiped by everyone no doubt. Jack had headed into the city for a client about some stock and was due home tonight, Ianto feeling slightly sad without him so Bunny had been employed for the afternoon, the kids enjoying her theatrics. They had been also enjoying the pool but the sun is not a friend to Welsh skin. Bunny was currently inside the doors to the patio with a book. A noise made her glance up.

"Mathew?" Bunny watched the young man moving swiftly from room to room, the intent clear. He was searching for someone and slightly frazzled.

"Bunny, have you seen Dad?"

"Sweetie … what's wrong? He's by the pool with the kids" Bunny pointed, watching him race out. She almost followed but hesitated as she watched him lean over to say something that made Jerry pull back, then frown. He rose and followed Mathew inside where Bunny waited. "Matty?"

"Look, Bunny love … something's happened and I need to talk to dad" Mathew said softly, "Jack will be home from the yards soon, I will need to…"

"Sweetheart, you forget yourself" Ianto's voice growled from behind the makeup, "My balls are large enough that even something that might make them shrivel will not incapacitate me!"

Mathew blinked, then snorted "Sorry. Yeah. It's just … I forget that's you."

"Thank you" she preened happily.

"There was a break-in a couple of ranches over" Mathew addressed his father who nodded.

"You said Ken and Vicki?" Jerry prompted, "You said they were gone? What do you mean? You mean …"

"Yeah. Dead" Mathew grimaced "looks like a robbery gone wrong. But … nothing much was taken. From what my friend whispers…the wedding rings and that diamond necklace she always wears were still intact … the safe not touched either."

"Did they know there was one?" Bunny asked, stepping down from her stilettos.

"It's a big old one that sits behind his desk, he has stuff on top. It's obvious when you enter the room, not even an attempt to hide it." Mathew explained, "I would have gone for that first … not ransack the bedroom and living room. His office is untouched."

Bunny nodded and headed upstairs, seeming to feel out of place when there was sorrows to be had. The way Jerry had said the names, they were friends and as Ianto sat and removed the makeup, he picked up his phone, calling Jack.

"I'm on my way love, you stay by Mum and the kids, OK?" Jack asked and Ianto hummed, "I will bring home pizza. Yeah?"

"Sounds good Cariad … in light of this .. should I let the staff go home? I mean … only Francine will want to stay. They might have the heebie-jeebies. Most of them all know one another right? They will want to check everyone is OK." Ianto asked and Jack agreed.

Ianto stared at his reflection then frowned as he dressed quickly to go down and Jerry looked up from his phone call as Ianto entered in a loose shirt unbuttoned at the neck and his trousers pressed, impeccably dressed as always. Ianto listened to the conversation and got the answer he didn't want. Not just them. Three staff were killed as well.

Francine was in the kitchen unaware of event, so Ianto knew she was the first to tell, whispering what had happened and she gasped reaching for her phone, "My niece works there. A maid."

Ianto stood with her and held her as she tried to get through, the relief when the girl finally answered was palpable, Francine leaning into Ianto for support as the girl weepily told her it was a ranch hand and two indoors staff gone. The cook and the young man who was setting the evening fires.

"Evening fires" Ianto said softly, "So… this happened last night."

"Seems so" Jerry entered and slumped in a chair, Gloria reached over to pat his arm gently.

"So … working in darkness where they wouldn't be disturbed, the evening meaning the day staff was all gone. The ranch hand no doubt one checking the horses and such, doing a security round. The two inside settling the couple before going home themselves. What a shame" Gloria sighed.

"OK, we have more coming" Mathew entered the room and leaned on the counter, "I have called the team from Denver, they are on a flight now. I want this entire place locked down so tight a fart will set off sensors."

"Charming" Ianto drolled, "Did you hear that Quinn? No farts. Uncle Matty said so."

Quinn looked up from his banana he was murdering to look at Mathew, who smiled and leaned in to kiss the little man's head, "It's OK kiddo. Your bananas are safe with me!"

Quinn blinked and held up a piece like he was offering it to him then crammed it in his mouth with a growl of glee. Mathew laughed and reached out to stroke the little man's head, "You are a show off. Just like your father."

"Ianto is right, we should send the staff home and just spend the rest of the day quietly, listen for updates and upgrade the security. This is the third hit in a month, the first to end like this though. The other break-ins were put down to vagrants, just food taken. Maybe it was … maybe it wasn't." Jerry frowned "Maybe it was someone or something being looked for."

"Well … they will find a gun up their pecker if they come here!" Gloria bristled, then placed a hand over her mouth as Ianto roared with mirth.

"Mama, you bad woman you!" Ianto laughed, the mood lightening a bit.

Francine said she was staying, setting in a chair to spoon feed the little boy who really could eat without help but enjoyed the fussing, the jelly nice too.

Ianto wanted Jack home.


	15. something is coming

Mica and David knew something was wrong, cutting short their swim to come inside, "Taddy? Can we watch a movie in the big flop room?"

"Yeah, good idea" Ianto nodded as he ushered them to the second living room that was really a doss room for the kids. The large couches full of pillows and blankets, the tables full of toys, remotes and other things the kids dragged in and out of their own rooms. This was their room.

Quinn wanted to stay with Gloria, perhaps sensing her need for cuddles toady so Ianto settled on a couch with the kids, blankets covering them and the lights turned low. They watched a movie he barely even took notice of, his mind counting down the time and he was now watching the door as he knew Jack should have been back already if he was coming straight home as promised.

Ianto felt weird, uncomfortable and he rose to head to the bedroom, removing the small gun form the safe and sliding it into the pocket of a waistcoat he put on, the tight fabric a comfort, almost like a corset. He knew it was an attempt to seek Bunny' calming influence and he resisted the urge to change for a while then gave in. Best be brave, right? Bunny wore a corset so tightly clinched she could hardly breathe, the large skirts making a sound like running water when she walked and she felt immensely better. She wafted down the stairs enjoying the feeling of grandeur even if no one was there to see, she made sure her hand was on the banister so the wedding rings glinted and her little heels peeked from under the skirts with each kick forward.

"Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn" she said then frowned as she wondered if it was the wrong quote then laughed as it seemed to fit anyway.

She entered the good room to find Gloria pouring a drink, turning to smile "Oh Bunny. You look adorable in that! I have a fur stole that would suit that."

She rushed off as Bunny settled primly on the arm of a chair, her ramrod straight back and small breasts pertly peeking from the flouncy lace across the top of the corset.

"You warm enough there pun'kin?" Jerry asked, moving to light the fire as he rubbed her knee affectionately and she smiled as she reached out to pat his shoulder, the affection so sweet. She knew he meant it, sometimes even telling people on the phone that his 'girl' had entered the room and he had to cut the call short. Felt nice to have a father. Helped her see how much more Ianto had to be for his own children, that level of affection. The stole was white, fake rabbit and the clasp at the front was all bling baby. Lovely. No wonder it had never been worn, sooooo flashy.

She took Quinn to their room and settled him on the bed in the guest house room she and Jack had been in before moving upstairs … they still kept it for the little prince as his day room … kicking off her shoes as she waited for Jack, he liked to come to this side of the house first to remove his boots and clean up. There was a crunch of gravel and she turned her head as the headlights lit the far wall, the dusk of evening settling to the darkness she usually found comforting but tonight it seemed more ominous than before.

She waited for the slam of the SUV door followed by Jack's boots on the concrete outside the large glass doors but they didn't come. Weird. She rose and walked over to the doors which were slightly ajar and slid out, looking into the garage and the vehicle was not Jack's, three doors were left open and the door to the side of the house was open, light spilling into the dimly lit garage to show the vehicle's spewed proof.

Bunny had mere moments to consider these events before she slipped back inside and picked up the sleepy toddler, kissing his face as she moved to the barn where she found Harris still settling the animals. He swung with surprise, and then frowned as he noted her bare feet and lack of coat in the cooling air.

"What's wrong?" he asked immediately.

"Is young Kyle still here?" Bunny asked softly, the boy in question coming out of the stall to stand by his father and nod. "Kyle, can you keep Quinn happy for a little while? There are some men at the house I need Dad to help me with, OK?"

"Sure Missus" the teenager smiled, reaching for the tot, "Come on Quinnie, you can help me feed the little calf."

Harris watched their children move away and then turned to face Bunny, "Men?"

"Vehicle I don't know, three doors open and they headed straight inside" she nodded, "I feel … bad."

"Well, if it's one thing I've learnt, trust a woman's intuition" Harris nodded as he strode over to open a drawer and pull some keys from his pocket, the large shot gun he pulled from the lock box pretty.

"Lovely … care to swap?"


	16. Rabbit is hunting

Bunny walked back the way she had come, sliding back into the dark bedroom as Harris walked to the front doors and simply entered as he always did, calling out that he was done for the evening and ready to go.

Bunny slid up the stairs, clinging to the wall and into the room she knew the kids would be in, both still engrossed in the movie.

"Babies, we have bad things happening and I need you to hide" she hissed, both heads turning to stare at her with shock, "Come on. We are going to the attic, like a game of hide and seek. Only Daddy can find us, come on now."

"Where's Quinn?" David was instantly on alert, sensing the danger.

"He's OK, he's in the barn with Kyle who will keep him there" Bunny whispered, "Come on love. No time for this, we have to go. Harris is downstairs and doing his thing, Jerry and Matt are home ... we will go hide and wait for Daddy."

David looked unconvinced, peering out the door with a frown, then he stepped towards the staircase.

"David!" she hissed "Don't you dare leave us! We need you. You are the man of the family until Daddy is home, come protect us!"

Dirty pool but it worked, Bunny relieved she was in her full garb and able to pull off a feminine pout. David nodded and headed for the attic stairs, both kids clambering up into the area they also played in a lot.

"Right, good kids. Stay up there, stay quiet. No matter what, you hear? Only me or Daddy will get you down. Do not come down for anyone else!" she demanded and David's face changed as he realised he had been played.

"You're not coming up?" he whined.

"No, I will go wait for Daddy" she lied, "I love you, be brave and remember you are Harkness-Jones'. No tears until it's all over."

"Yes mama" Micha nodded sadly, "You come back."

"I love you munchkin bum … David, my big strong man I love you to the moon and back, I am so proud of you both." Bunny smiled as David hit the switch then she watched the stairs move up and close to become invisible. Once she was sure they were safe she slid back down, the shogun no longer hidden in her shirts as she snapped it shut and took a deep breath, moving towards the raised voices in the kitchen.

She looked around the corner to find to men there with Jerry in their sights, one with a gun raised as the other pulled out drawers.

"Just tell us what you are looking for" Mathew demanded as he tried to get closer to his father, "We will give you whatever you want if you just leave."

"If ya don't shut your pie hole I'll shut it for ya!" the man with the gun snarled.

"Not here!" the Drawer Opener declared, "Must be somewhere else."

"Move to the living room, might be there!" the gun waver said.

Bunny considered and let the shot gun slide back into the fold of her skirts ruffling them until the gun and her hand disappeared, then she called out softly, "Mama?"

"Oh god" Gloria gasped as Bunny entered the room and looked at the men with shock.

"Oh my, what's going on here?" she asked with wide eyes and her body turned so the skirts hid her weapon, "Mama?"

"It's alright love, they will leave soon" Jerry said unsteadily and Bunny noted the trickle of blood down the side of his face. They had struck him.

Wait a minute.

Three doors.

Two men.

She stepped back to the wall, controlling her space so no one could come behind her and made out like she was shocked, her hand to her mouth as she watched the men talk, argue and then motion everyone to the living room.

Number three was there, the place upended and books everywhere.

"Did ya find it?" Gun Waver asked.

"Nah, but I found that!" the man pointed and everyone looked at the book with confusion.

"The old stock ledgers?" Jerry frowned with confusion, "what the hell do you want that for?"

"To your left. All the old ledgers and files are in that cabinet" Mathew pointed, "Whatever you need."

The Drawer Opener headed over and started pulling things out then gave a bark of excitement, "Got it. Right? This is?"

He held up something that looked like a trophy and Jerry sighed softly, "Really? The old Rodeo Trophies? You are doing all this for that? Gods alive. You're Barnaby Kent's boys aren't you. This is about his feud with the bloody Rodeo Authorities that stripped him of his buckles. Come on … Sergeant happily bowed to him, even argued for him to have the buckle when it was handed to him as runner up. Your father wouldn't accept it. You are really doing all this for him?"

"Dad won those fair and square!" Drawer Opener snarled.

"And Kent and Victoria Dale?" Jerry snarled back "They deserved to die for this?"

Drawer Opener and Gun Waver looked at him like he was mad but Book Thrower continued to hunt like nothing was wrong.

"Connor?" Gun Waver said angrily, "what the hell does he mean by that?"

"He had a gun, I was defending us" Connor snapped.

"Really? We were gone, you said you left your hat behind … shit. We never heard gun shots. You used the silencer? Ahhhh shit. Dad didn't want that. What the hell!" Gun Waver let his weapon drop as he gaped at his older brother and Drawer Opener joined in.

"Dad's gonna kill us"

"Not unless I do first" Jack snarled from the doorway, his Webley trained on the youngest one who was still holding the trophy.

,

,

,

,

Those of you asking about the extra security please remember this is all happenig that same day they heard about the deaths. As securtiy was flying in .. they are not yet here. It was too little too late.


	17. wham bam thank you ma'am

"Shit! Captain!"

"Con!" Jack walked into the room and glanced at Bunny, "You OK sweetheart?"

"Yes Cariad, just a little shaken by this" she replied still hugging the wall and Jack took in her stance, his eye sliding to her arm for a moment before back to the men.

"What the fuck are you doing?"

"The trophies, the Rodeo trophies" Jerry supplied the answer, "They have finally decided to meter out justice for their father's exclusions."

"He won fair and square!" Drawer Opener snarled.

"And we always agreed with that Skippy" Jack snorted, the young man suddenly lunging at Jack with a gun appearing from his pocket.

Bunny swung the rifle up, firing from the hip and she was as surprised as everyone else when she actually hit the man, flinging him back into the bookcase. Jerry gaped as Mathew snatched the gun from Gun Waver and Harris swung the pistol he had been hiding into the head of the third one.

Bunny stood in shocked silence as Jack stepped forward, his own weapon trained on the two not hit and the one who was howling from the buck-salt that had hit his crotch froze as Jack cocked the gun and frowned down at him. He retrained his gun as Harris took over the waving part.

"You know … I don't know what I hate more. The fact you've hurt Jerry or that my love had to do something violent in her pretty frock!" Jack snarled, "But I am not happy about this at all guys!"

"Mama, the bub is in the barn, the other two in the attic" Bunny said as she turned to Gloria, "You and Francine go get Quinn and young Kyle. The boys have this under control, I wanna cuddle my children."

"Children?" Gun Waver frowned, "what kids?"

"We have three children" Jack snarled as Bunny fled the room, "Three little children, the youngest still a little toddler and you came in here to what ... kill us all?"

"Wait…I don't understand."

"No? The Sherriff is on his way, he can help you with that!" Jerry barked, rising unsteadily to follow Bunny to the children, knowing the little princess would be beside herself.

Once the Sheriff arrived Jack went up to find young Kyle standing by the door to the room with the shotgun, nodding as he stepped aside to let him in and Jack settled to look at the children, asleep with Bunny.

All the goodness in the universe contained on one sofa.

Bunny stirred and smiled up at him as he leaned in to kiss her, little Quinn grumbling as she shifted to deepen the kiss.

"Hey" Jack soothed, the little man sniffling back to sleep.

"Well, all the bluster of more security … they are arriving now" Jack snorted, Talk about irony."

"Are they gone?" Bunny whispered, "I still don't understand what happened."

"Ten years back, there was a huge scandal in the Rodeo Circles. It was found that their father was drugging the horses. Looks like they decided to gather his confiscated trophies and return them to him for his bloody sixtieth birthday!" Jack huffed, "they didn't realise their brother was taking it a step further now. I don't know. Maybe they did."

"Their poor mother" Bunny sighed and Jack smiled at her, that sweet part of her so desirable as she lay there stroking Quinn's hair.

"So then missus… of all the things you have hidden in your shirts… a shot gun?" he joked and she giggled as she agreed it was quite a stroke of madness.

"Is Jerry OK? I know he would hate for me to fuss, he keeps leaving the room. Is he still bleeding?"

"No love, he's upset. I think the thought of you all being in danger is making him physically ill. Can't say I blame him, this was not a good night." Jack sighed, "Not a good night at all."

"You need anything?" Jack asked as he reached out to touch her face.

"I just needed you home, you are. It's OK now" she smiled, "Maybe Quinn off me bladder?"

Jack grinned as he lofted their sack of potatoes, kissing a hot little cheek and carrying him through to his little nursery where he sniffled into the cool sheets and settled. Bunny followed and slid her arms around Jack from behind, "I am so tired I old sleep for a week but the nightmares might keep that from me."

"I know" Jack grimaced, his own 'what if' scenarios already running though his mind and he turned to hug his beloved tightly, thanking whatever gods were listening for protecting his precious family.

"Are you alright?" Mathew asked as he entered to find them like that, "I will stay with the two horrors, go on. Go take some time. No doubt we will have little sleep tonight, Dad is already on the whiskey even with his head. I don't know."

"I think we will do whatever we have to in order to get though the night, maybe the dawn will bong perspective" Bunny reached out and took Mathew's hand, "We all did good. In the end … we all did good."

"Sez Annie Oakley!"


End file.
